The call of duty for military families often requires us to disrupt close family ties and leave behind lifelong friends. With every PCS transition, my heart would ache for the certainty and security of growing up in small-town Texas. It was like growing up in a warm, fuzzy cocoon - where people were who they said they were; did what they said they would do – where your word was your bond.   

Fast forward to mid-career. I was a young Army wife with two young sons, Trey and David, age 9 and 8. We’d traveled for 26 hours to join my husband, Frank, on a two-year assignment to the Kingdom. This was our first assignment as a family accompanying our Soldier abroad.

I’ll never forget that day we stepped off the plane in Saudi Arabia. It was what I call ‘baptism by fire’! It felt like we were stepping into the breath of a dragon. 

Imagine. We were exhausted and bone-tired from the seventeen-hour flight from Houston to Dhahran, Saudi Arabia. We were burdened with uncertainty and fear about what to expect in this volatile region of the world. I looked out the window and noted the plane had stopped short of the terminal, then quickly scanned the landscape for any sign of Frank waiting there to welcome us in country - no Frank. The boys took a death grip on each of my hands as we haltingly descended the steps, our eyes taking in unfamiliar sights and sounds of this foreign environment. There were ripples of searing heat rising off the tarmac, which created what appeared to be a mysterious mirage between us and the terminal, looming like a roaring lion; foreboding; a frightening wall of fire! 

Fear gripped my heart like a tourniquet! I remember looking down at each of our boys…both with a bear grip on my hands; both peering up at me with anxious eyes that exclaimed, “Mommy, I’m scared! Are we going to be OK here?” Suddenly, I was painfully aware of how far we were outside our comfort zone!   

My mind flashed back to my own childhood - happy, secure, deep roots, a loving family, and lifelong friends. At this juncture, we had multiple stateside moves under our belt; however, we were unprepared for this tumultuous moment in time. A visual image appeared of my precious parents back in Texas, when we said good-bye to board this plane, daddy choked back tears, while mother’s tears persisted, escaping her eyelids, and flowing down her cheeks. More than once, they’d begged me not to take their grandsons to the Middle East. Instantly, my brief reverie was highjacked by a life-altering epiphany which hit me like a ton of bricks! I was confronted with a stark reality experienced by military families worldwide, i.e., the same level of commitment required of our soldier was now required of me and of us as a family!

The Terror Barrier

A wave of panic swept over me like a cold, dark cloud! My first thought was to gather our boys in my arms and run back to the safety of the American crew and military transport C5 that delivered us there! My next, more reasoned, measured thought was that I had a major, immediate decision to make. Emerging from the depts of my being was the realization that IF we chose to walk through that wall of fire, there was no turning back! This was my defining moment.